Unrelax

I almost never have a massage. However, when I do, I always imagine a relaxing experience that leaves you limber and loose. This never happens.

Due to long hours of exercise and very little stretching, my body is in a constant state of equilibrium. The slightest bump or pressure on my legs causes pain and discomfort. This brings great pleasure to my wife who uses this knowledge to get me to do things or just straight out hurt me. But it does not make a relaxing massage.

Yesterday, I had my 3rd massage ever and I wanted to cry. The only thing preventing me from screaming for mercy was the fact that I didn't want to look soft in front of everyone. There was no relaxing music or aroma candles, just me gripping the legs of the massage table and fighting back the tears.

Today, everything is sore. My legs throb with every pedal stroke. They tell me that a sports massage is supposed to hurt a little. The sad thing is, my massage was only a relaxation massage!